My Son Was Born Perfect

My name is Nora and this is my son, Hayden. He's six months old today and has such a big personality already! He's a sweet boy, and has a gentle and caring soul. He loves playing with his kitty and puppy, and he's a big cuddler! Everything is perfect about him and I wish I would've realized it earlier...

My poor baby was mutilated in the hospital at birth when I allowed a doctor to needlessly take a knife to his genitals -- me, his mother, the one who was supposed to protect him.

I don't think I'll ever forgive myself.

When I was pregnant I researched everything: vaccinations, breastfeeding and natural weaning, extended rear-facing, GMOs, attachment parenting, etc., but never circumcision. I actually don't even remember my husband and I 'talking' about whether or not we'd circumcise our son. It was just a simple question for my husband (you know, the one with the penis who doesn't even know what it's like to have foreskin...)

"Are we going circumcise him?" I asked.

And immediately -- with a loud and stern voice he answered, "YES."

That was the end of that conversation for us.

Ever since I started researching and learning, I've come to find out that women have foreskin too - and that the decision of keeping my son intact should have been mine to make, not my husband's. I look at the mistake I made everyday when I change diapers or bathe my son. I think everyday how this will effect him when he's older.

I remember my mom told me once when I was little, "The children always suffer for the ignorant mistakes their parents will make." It never meant anything to me until now... I wish someone would've educated me. I wish someone would've told me to research. I wish I hadn't betrayed my son's trust in me. He was born perfect.


Read more from parents who will be keeping future sons intact: DrMomma.org/2010/05/i-circumcised-my-son-healing-from.html To share your story, email SavingSons@gmail.com

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Expecting a baby boy? Don't make the same mistake I did.

By Taylor Faulkner © 2016

In June 2012, I was given the most precious of all gifts. A baby boy. He was perfect. Beautiful. The whole nine months I prepared for this baby boy. I researched everything I could think of, plus some. It all made sense. I was going to be the best mom ever.

But, I failed him. I knew I was going to breastfeed. I knew I was going to delay solids. I knew I was going to practice extended rear-facing. I thought I knew it all. I read books and articles all day, every day. But, somehow one of the most important pieces of information slipped past me: circumcision.

I had friends tell me it's not necessary, but I had only ever seen one intact penis in my life. A child I babysat as a teen... and I was convinced he would get infections...

I live in Canada, and here they don't perform circumcision at the hospital. Instead, at his first check up at one week old, the doctor asked us if we were going to circumcise him. We (his circumcised Dad and I) said, "Of course!" It makes me shudder just to think about.

We were referred to a doctor who performs the surgery.

One week later it was the day of our scheduled appointment. My son was 2 weeks old. I had felt sick about it the whole week but I figured that feeling was normal because he was so fresh and new and having a 'procedure' done.

I didn't research what this procedure entailed. I failed him... again.

I could have looked into things that whole week. I could have done so much to stop it.

They took the babies back one by one from parents in the waiting rooms. We were all in different rooms, but I could hear them all screaming. It was like a torture chamber -- just more sanitary.

They took my son back and I cried the whole 20 minutes he was gone. Hysterical. It felt disgusting. They told me my feelings were "normal." I thought it was all normal. All of it. But it wasn't.

He came back --- silent.

"He did great. He didn't even cry."

In fact, he was the only baby not crying. It must have went smooth, I thought. Right?

But his face was red... his eyes were blank.

"Thank you." I said as I paid the secretary (for butchering my son). I THANKED THEM. For cutting my brand new baby and torturing him for a good 15 minutes. I PAID THEM. I PAID THEM AND THANKED THEM FOR THIS.

We left. He started to cry when we strapped him into his carseat. At home, he wouldn't latch to breastfeed. He refused to eat. He cried. He slept. Any normal human being would act the same if they were in immense pain.

Later that night, while changing his diaper, he screamed as we changed the gauze. I'll never forget the amount of blood and the amount of guilt and pain and screaming that all happened at once. It was the most pain I'd ever felt emotionally. It was at that moment I realized that I had messed up -- really bad. I really messed up.

The surgical wound healed and up to that point he had no problems. So, I left it alone... swept the whole ordeal under the rug.

When my son was not yet one year old I discovered how big of a mistake I had really made.

HORROR. It was pure horror. I saw a post on Facebook, and I then began my research. I cried. Every night for a week. I still cry sometimes. I can't believe I failed my baby so badly. The only thing I can do now is help others. Stop them from making the same mistake I made. A mistake I will never make again.

My son will be educated on what I allowed to happen to him, and on his restoration options, to regain some of what was stolen from him as a baby. I won't let him live in ignorance to cover up my mistakes.  And thankfully, his dad feels the same way.

Read more from parents who will be keeping future sons intact: DrMomma.org/2010/05/i-circumcised-my-son-healing-from.html To share your story, email SavingSons@gmail.com

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